So today I went to my neurologist and that’s what he said. He is a lot more of a straight shooter than the last moronic neurologist I went to. He’s not a mealy mouthed jerk like my last one. He didn’t tell me what a nasty disease it is and him haw around about it. Just the straight facts. The last one went so far as to tell me I was primary progressive and then change his mind. Like really? What professional does that?
I have to say it’s a hard pill to swallow. I kind of had a feeling I had progressed but hearing it sure didn’t make me feel any better. He had my records from my other neurologist and MRI discs. That coupled with me not having any stamina at this point and not being able to rehab after the flare over a year ago he feels this is where I’m at.
I’m far from stupid and really didn’t need him to tell me this. I mean come on 3-5 days bedrest after 1-2 days of activity kind of says it all. I knew this but we have this thing it’s called denial. You know that thing in your head that says fuck this there’s no way in hell I’m going that route. Yeah I’m guilty of it. I covered the sun with my hand.
Eh, with all that being said I’m still going to rock MS!! I’m going to fucking rock secondary progressive like a mother effer!! On decent days I’ll still do my hair and make up and dress cute. I’m not in a wheelchair so there’s that. I’m positive I have a great life still and all, because I’m a badass and know no other way to be!
I’ll still attempt to play golf with my cutie even if I have to rest all week to have one or two fun days.
My family will see me through this and we will continue to be “that crazy family”. We’re fun, we’re loud and by golly we have a good time and at the end of the day that’s all that matters.
The neuro also said he’ll forward everything to my social security atty so they have proper documentation on hand. This is a good thing for sure, maybe now Social security will get with the program and not make me beg for what I’ve worked my whole fucking life for.
I will save you all from my rant about Social security and end this with enjoy whatever good times you can, life itself is a gift❤️