As I lay in bed contemplating life and all of its idiosyncrasies, I think to myself am I going to let this day slip by my like yesterday did? Hell no, If anything I’m going to try.
Yesterday was a bit rough, but I got through. I laid in bed most of the day and didn’t do squat. I was never one of those people that could rest easily. Now I find it a have to, on more days than I care to think about.
I remember back before I progressed. I remember getting up for work and thinking damn this shit has GOT to get better. I was able to pump myself up mentally and get my ass out the door for work.
Well it didn’t get better. If anything it got worse. I’m not complaining because this is par for the course for some MSers. Did I think it would happen to me? Absolutely freaken NOT! I thought I was 10ft tall and bullet proof. Unfortunately my body had another plan. The plan was I would progress to the point I had to leave work and have to rest more than do productive things.
I’ve always been really good about psyching myself up to conquer certain goals. Thankfully I’m still good at this little mind trick of mine. These days I find I have to psych myself up to do little things. I literally pump myself up mentally to shower or vacuum the house.
Even fun things take a pumping up like getting in my yard to garden or play a round of golf with the hubby.
Today I’m going to pump myself up to go to the gym. I cancelled with my son yesterday because I just couldn’t manage. Today I WILL manage as best I can. He’ll be patient as he always is. Thankfully my kids have a realistic grasp on most of my limitations. Every now and again one of them will come out with something silly and I’ll have to break it down for them.
This gets a bit old, but how can they really understand the full scope of how my body feels? They can’t and that’s ok. I don’t mind explaining to them.
People don’t generally get it. Even other MSers sometimes don’t get it because they’re not dealing with the same issues. I admit I too was one of these people. I would look at people and think….damn they just gave up. Well I can vouch for those people at this point. At no time have I given up, but my body isn’t complying at this point. There are days all the mind tricks just don’t work.
The point I’m poorly trying to convey is you don’t know until you know. Now I know. So I’m going to pump myself up and attempt to do the gym thing. I’ll let you all know how it turns out.
Happy Friday folks let’s keep it positive.