Self pity….A bottomless pit of shit

Yesterday was a really great day. Went to the gym, I kicked ass and took numbers. I finished the day with a trip to the dentist to have a filling replace.

Today wasn’t that great a day. Went to the gym and petered out like a punk. I posted on FB about feeling puny today and ended it with me calling it a win for team Al. I didn’t do much but I went so that is still a win in my book.

I admit I didn’t really feel like I won but I ended my statement on a positive note. I truly believe any day we wake is a gift. Even the not so great days are a blessing.

Wound up going home and getting back in my Jammie’s to rest . It’s ok, we can have those days. I’m not in the least bit looking for pity when I post such things. That’s one of the reasons I always end things on a high note.

The pity party is destructive and damaging to the person as well as those around them. I’ve come to notice some actually feed off of the pity they collect. Not me, I freaken hate it. I always say “don’t feel bad for me I’m doing more than most able bodied people”. I say this because I really am doing better than most. Maybe not physically, but I think my head is in a good place. With the exception of my sometimes dark and twisted sense of humor.

I believe some of my aversion to this way of doing stems from being so prideful. I am a very proud and possibly harsh woman . I was raised to never quit and to push through no matter what. I’ve always been of the thinking that I don’t need anyone because I have my own back. While these days I’m a lot slower and do need the help of family more than I am đź’Ż percent comfortable with. I begrudgingly accept the help given when needed.

While scrolling through FB I saw several posts in a group that really unnerved me. One woman was complaining about how her grown kids still have their belongings at her house. She posted a pic of clothes etc strewn about her house. Really? She was complaining because it was a huge mess and they won’t help her clean it up.

While reading all I could think was come on lady why would you ask advice about this . Her kids don’t live there and won’t help go through it to sort it out. So she took to FB to complain instead of figuring out a solution to her problem. Granted if she’s bedridden she couldn’t do it herself. What she could do instead of posting about it on FB would be to call around to different organizations to see about assistance with getting rid of the stuff her kids apparently no longer wanted

My opinion was she was wanting everyone to say oh jeez I’m so sorry and bash her kids and ex for not helping. My advice was throw a bag or two away weekly. I also went on to say that she allowed this behavior and what she allows is what will continue.

I don’t think this woman was really wanting advice, but wanting to stir up a pity party.

Why complain about a situation you can change, but choose not to? A HUGE pet peeve of mine is when someone complains but does nothing to improve their situation.

I may be harsh but I don’t sugar coat and do not stroke people that are  looking for a pity party. This is just feeding the BS and I will not be a party to such nonsense.

Earlier in the day I saw another woman asking how she is going to survive SPMS.

I told her to try and stay positive and stress free. Ya know kind of the same way she was surviving RRMS? I know it’s quite a blow to be had but it is doable.

Is it fun? No it sucks royally but we’ve been given the gift of life and we need to appreciate every single day.

I really don’t understand why people wallow in self pity. Maybe they get a charge out of people commenting on how sorry they are for their issues. Regardless it’s a poison to get started in this way of thinking.

While some revel in it being pitied I find it uncomfortable which leads me to acting awkward because I find it so very unnerving.

I write this blog as an outlet as well as to educate, NOT to be pitied. Don’t pity me I’m still the HBIC. There are much worse situations than mine. Let’s be grateful for the things we have and not dwell in being sad sacks. If anything those around you will hold you in high regard and possibly be inspired by your will to overcome challenges.

Author: mswithmsalex

A funny gals take on the ups and downs of dealing with MS. The stuff people don't like to talk about. The hilarious situations I've found myself in. I hope this brings laughter to a disease that isn't very humorous

5 thoughts on “Self pity….A bottomless pit of shit”

  1. You’re pretty sharp Alex, and I think you can tell who gets it from those who follows your blog and comment. You will get no pity from the corner, just a nod of understanding and a kick in the ass if you become pathetic, which I sincerely doubt. We are alike in many ways. Balls to the wall, full steam ahead, and deal with the consequences. When the time comes to vent, let us vent, but don’t try to fix anything. Be there for a shoulder to cry on.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Heck yeah!!! You are my kind of people. I love it when someone doesn’t think I’m a harsh bitch but understands my thought process. Not everyone does unfortunately . A nod of understanding or a kick in the ass (when needed) are always appreciated.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I couldn’t agree with you more. I get that we all have days and need to vent from time to time but there are some that everything seems to be a major crisis. A need for attention. MS/chronic illness sucks but it sucks a whole lot more if you make it.

    Liked by 1 person

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